synaesthesiaJP

It is a strange thing to say for a man, but I always had a vision of how my own wedding would play out. Call me a new romantic, or just a little bitch, but I always saw a close group of friends watching me walk down the aisle in Tadao Ando’s Church of Light, dressed in a made-to-measure Tom Ford suit, with a gorgeous bride dressed in a Vera Wang gown soon following me. I dreamed of a hybrid between the traditional and non-traditional, a statement of who I am as a person, but more importantly who I am as a member of a team; one that from that day forward would be inexorably tied together not just by the bonds of love, but by the bonds if marriage. Surely it is hubris to plan such an event without the hint of who or when, but sometimes dreams do come true.

Mine did.

Except my dream wasn’t realized for me, but for two of my dearest friends, Robert and Marlena Love.

I don’t think that I have ever been happier, nor as emotional, as I was at their wedding. To see two individuals who have shared so much, who put away fears and past trespasses to allow love to conquer what circumstance could have easily torn apart, take their vows was a unique privilege that I will treasure forever. To see them share the same sort of wedding dream that I had held privately, down to the Tom Ford suit and the Vera Wang gown, could easily be written off as coincidence. However, one dismisses such coincidence at their own peril.

Rather I took it to be a confirmation of their love through the my own personal experiences. To accept no compromise. To want the best for your partner. To see it through no matter what bad cards are dealt along the path. All of these are emotions I’ve felt in my own personal wedding fantasy, and seeing two people who shared this fantasy, but also made it a reality, gives me supreme confidence that not only are their feelings true, but they will certainly be lasting.

In a way there was a certain melancholy that came with seeing them wed. They had found their happy ending in a mirror image of what I always thought mine would be. But any bittersweet feelings were overcome by the joy I had in seeing two of my most beloved friends make official in their own way, with their own dreams and words and vows, what I had known and continue to know to be true. While it takes courage and maturity to believe, compromise and patience to sustain, love truly conquers all.

Robert and Marlena proved it to me when I had come to doubt it myself. It was a gift worth more than the hours or miles of distance traveled, and it is one for which I am eternally grateful.

Enjoy your lives together. May your happiness and love grow stronger each day.

Tags: Marlena Martinez, old friends, Robert Love, true love, wonderful times

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